When you have kids, you’ll experience emotions that you didn’t even know existed. Nothing could make feel me more at peace than a sleeping baby who cried for the past few hours. Getting four kids to nap at the same time, made me feel like an all-star athlete. Going an entire day without the kids arguing, makes me feel like I am a parenting rock star.
A temper tantrum from a three year old, could make me question my existence. Camryn making her Chewbacca noise for an hour straight makes me not at all feel bad for her and makes me not even care that it very well may be a result of the Autism. Sorry, just keeping it real… ?
Our kids make us all feel many emotions.
Having a child with a disability has given me such strong feelings of anguish and sorrow, emotions I have yet to feel with the other girls. I remember years ago hiding in my bathroom, laying on the floor, sobbing after reading the evaluation report that Cam had a Moderate Intellectual Disability. For some reason, that diagnosis hurt so much more than Global Developmental Delay or Autism. Like labels matter or define these kids!! An evaluation is not a life sentence. It was a moment of such despair though.
On the other hand, I have never felt such hope, love, strength and joy. As a matter of fact, I never even realized I could be full of so much hope, love, strength and joy. Our other girls provide us with so much, but Camryn is a daily reminder of how anything is possible. Watching a child with a disability reach milestones is surreal and I would compare it to having VIP access to the best show in the world.